Zathras' Great Machine

I heard about your job going away - I hope it goes better for you soon. I am happy Marie is now available - that is one more worry off your mind.

What about your life is pretty grim? The job is a setback, but there are others where you are, and where Denise lives too.

GREAT attitude there! It'll get you very far in life. BTW, who the heck is Marie?

Marie is the cat in the post "Cat photos!" that we rescued near the end of my last visit, then P subsequently surrendered to the local SPCA shortly after I left. We've been hoping to get her back, but the shelter didn't put her back up for adoption until recently -- and since they won't re-adopt to P, we have to find somebody else that can pick her up. :-p

I have a photo of her here:
http://www.sonic.net/mustang/moggy/photos/cats/Marie_stretching.jpg

That "attitude" is called clinical depression. It's caused by an imbalance in brain chemistry -- not something he chooses, any more than I choose to be an asthmatic. Any basic psychology or biology course dealing with mental functions would teach you that.

Either way, I don't think that attacking P is the right thing to do right now, unless your goal is to make him feel even worse. As his friends, we should be supporting him as he works on bringing his life back to what it should be, not kicking him while he's down. Sheesh.

Even with the depression, Parrish is not 'made of glass' - he won't break from a little chiding from a freind. One of the things I disliked when I was severely depressed is being patronised or treated like I was going to explode at any moment.

In 'guy culture' chiding someone for having a 'bad attitude' is a sign that someone cares about you. I don't think Shaw was intending to hurt Parrish, just poke him a little to get him 'back on track'. Unfortunatley, willpower doesn't have much to do with improving things with depression, but I would think Parrish might appreciate the effort, even if it wouldn't have much of a real effect.

I would not condemn Shaw for writing what he did - it may have not been the most effective thing to do, but I don't think it was intended to hurt Parrish, just give him a not so gentle prod to get Parrish moving in the right direction. OTOH, there may be other stuff going on I am not aware of...

I was also referring to the post on Shaw's blog, which went way beyond friendly chiding.

Oh, ok. I thought there might be something I wasn't seeing. I'll go read it.

Well, I see how you could get upset about Shaw saying things like "get out of that cess pool and move on", "Self-pity doesn't get you a job or a life", etc.

While this could work with someone that was a bit discouraged about a job loss, Parrish is severely depressed, which is different. I don't think Shaw really understands what depression is like: Positive thinking has no effect on it, the circumstances of your life have little effect on it. As Denise said, it is a chemical imbalance in the brain.

Parrish had a great job and got the woman he pursued for years, but that didn't affect the depression.

The only things that affect depression are antidepressants, and to a much lesser extent, exercise and stress reduction.

You may be angry at Shaw, but I learned that I should not attribute to malice what could be attributed to ignorance or stupidity, and I think it was just ignorance on Shaw's part.

Unless there is MORE stuff I don't know about -this seems to be a regular occurrence for me here :) )

Yep - just read Denises other blog - lots more stuff involved. *sigh*