Zathras' Great Machine

A meandering commentary on television shows

The amount of television that I watch has started to decline over the past year or so, and it appears that the trend is going to accelerate. There are three show, in particular, that are coming close to being crossed off my list of "regulars".

Mutant X. This show's first season was great, featuring a fantastic storyline, great heroes and villains, and a "look and feel" that was clearly strongly influenced, in a good way, by The Matrix. The first fight in the series premier episode, in particular -- the one where Shalimar and Jesse rescued Emma from her pursuers, after which they brought her to Sanctuary for the first time -- was about as slick as anything I've ever seen, with wonderful choreography and a soundtrack that was topnotch. Now, the show is really going downhill; they've lost their main villains, Mason Eckhart and Genomex, and two of the main characters -- including the leader of "Mutant X"! -- were killed off at the end of last season, to be replaced by the far-inferior Lexa and an Illuminati-type organization called "The Dominion". (This slide has been coming since last season, actually. If I see one more TV show attempt to use any kind of "interview" format, whether it be a TV reporter, a trial, or anything else, to conduct an entire show in flashback, I'm going to clobber the writers.)

Gene Roddenberry's Andromeda. Again, an initially great show that's been sliding for the last year or two, and for a lot of the same reasons. The dialogue is becoming increasingly corny and contrived. The direction has a very different "feel" now than it did during the first season or two, which is also true for Mutant X. And Andromeda, like Mutant X, has also resorted to the "flashback" episode. (Hint for writers: when you do that, it's painfully obvious that you're doing it because you're trying to meet a deadline but don't have any fresh ideas for episodes. If you're having that much trouble, it's time to resign and pass the reigns over to someone else.) The only really enjoyable ep of Andromeda I've seen in a while is "Twilight of the Idols", where Michael Ironside guest-starred. Ironside is a great character actor, and I really enjoy just about everything he does, although he seems to work best as a supporting actor... he was the lead actor in Neon City, for example, and I didn't think he was nearly as good in that film.

A problem common to both Andromeda and Mutant X is that important changes in the overall storyline come much too abruptly, giving the whole series a "choppy" feeling. In Mutant X, for example, Genomex and its head, Mason Eckhart, basically just vanish. And in Andromeda, the Commonwealth pretty much appears out of thin air. You can't do that... you have to take the time to explain what's going on, introduce the changes to the viewer, and -- most importantly -- lay the groundwork for whatever is going to replace any element you're removing.

In fact, now that I think about it, I'd imagine that a lot of people involved in the production of Mutant X are also involved in the production of Andromeda, since both shows are produced by the same company, Fireworks Entertainment, and both shows are having a lot of the same problems at the same time. (For that matter, Beastmaster also comes from Fireworks, and Beastmaster went off my list some time ago for these and other reasons, some related, others not).

Enterprise. Yet another show that started off good but is going to the dogs. I particularly like the "look and feel" of Enterprise -- the sets and costumes really make you feel like you're looking at some type of near-future "NASA" type ship and crew. Episodes, also, started off good, but are slipping. Not long ago, there was an entire episode that was essentially a rip-off of Night of the Living Dead, only it was psychotic undead Vulcans on a dark damaged ship instead of psychotic undead humans in a dark damaged farmhouse. Also, in the series premiere, there was a brief dalliance with sexualizing the T'Pol character, which the writers wisely abandoned... however, this season, they are reviving that angle, and with the most recent episode, it has gone beyond annoying and become actively insulting. (My understanding is that the writers are bringing in all the T&A in an effort to boost Enterprise's sagging ratings, much as they introduced "Seven of Nine" on Star Trek: Voyager for the same reason.) The "neuropressure" sessions were farfetched enough, but having T'Pol -- a Vulcan, no less -- jump Trip's bones just as a "study in human sexuality"? I haven't heard of anything so contrived since the plot of "Deep Rising".

One thing about Enterprise that does keep me coming back -- at least for now -- is the recurring role of Shran, played by Jeffrey Combs. Combs is an excellent character actor, and watching him work, bringing that odd, unbalanced, borderline-psychotic feeling that he brings to every role he plays, is always a wonderful delight. However, even Combs isn't going to keep me coming back to Enterprise if this keeps up.

Unless these trends change, it looks like my SF/Fantasy lineup is going to be getting slimmer, and I don't think I'll be looking for much of anything to replace it. Beastmaster got cut from my regular viewing list some time ago, and Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's: The Lost World was never on it (although I did watch three or four eps just to make sure it was what I thought it was). Note to Telescene, the producers of TLW -- putting Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's name in the title isn't fooling anyone, and we all know which movies' popularity you're trying to cash in on. Same note also to Fireworks Entertainment, the producers of the now-cancelled Relic Hunter and Queen of Swords. In the case of Relic Hunter, the source material is so ridiculously obvious that just the title gives it away. (I should know. I asked my friend Holly once whether she'd ever watched it, and she said, "No, I've never heard of it. Is it an Indiana Jones rip-off?". Queen of Swords' origin is only marginally more obscure.) If you could be honest about adapting Beastmaster for the small screen, you could do the same thing with RH and QoS. (Or, for that matter, with Mutant X... it's no wonder you got sued by Marvel Comics...)

Smallville, at least, is still doing well, and the writers are still doing a good job of coming up with fresh ideas (the recent ep explaining how Clark Kent got his super-hearing, for example, was a real peach, very novel). I haven't yet been able to find out why they changed the theme song. The original theme music was supposed to be Perry Farrell's "Song Yet To Be Sung", which for some reason was replaced by Remy Zero's "Save Me", which is markedly inferior to the Farrell tune.

All in all, though, it looks like decent SF, fantasy, and action on TV are pretty much out the window, and there doesn't appear to be anything up and coming to replace it. I miss Xena, and I miss Robocop, which was among the best TV shows I've ever seen but never went anywhere; most people never even knew that there ever wasa Robocop TV series. I also miss Jack of all Trades, which was a really funny show and a great opportunity for Bruce Campbell to do what he does best: chew up the scenery (and again: that's another one that most people have never heard of).

Then, too, there are other shows that died a quiet and deserved death. Birds of Prey was a neat concept that was badly developed and didn't really have anywhere to go, and it didn't last long. The television adaptation of The Crow would have been a good idea, and its lead, Mark Dacascos (a Honolulu native like myself), was perfectly cast. However, the The Crow: Stairway to Heaven overlooked an important element that made the original Crow with Brandon Lee such a success: its darkness. StH, inexplicably, was filmed almost entirely in daylight, which really ruined the effect. Gene Roddenberry's Earth: Final Conflict had the potential to be a great series, right up there with Babylon 5, but the storyline showed a serious lack of cohesion, so it never came together well. (Bizarrely, my local TV station never showed the series finale. I'm still annoyed about that.)

OK... no, there was no central theme to any of that, or any real point to it... it was mostly just a rantlet-type thing for me to say some various things that have been swirling thru my head lately.

Posted by Zathras at February 15, 2004 06:42 PM