Investigation Revels Grape Shortage in Rhone Valley
A CLINE TIMES EXCLUSIVE
Mourvedria, CA-- A long-term, undercover investigation conducted by the internal Rhonevenue Service (IRS) released its findings on Tuesday, June 3rd that suggest alarming grape shortage in Southern France. In a press conference held at the Cline government's headquarters in Sonoma shortly after the release of IRS findings, Fred Cline, spokesman for the IRS discussed details of his investigation into what is sure to become the wine industry's most damaging scandal to date.The IRS, political arm of Mourvedria's para-military Rhone Rangers, began its investigations after an anonymous caller, speaking in a heavy French accent, solicited the Cline government's Director of Beverages, Matt Cline, for vine cuttings of Southern France's traditional varietals: Mourvedre, Syrah, Cinsault and Carignane. Tracking the call back to a large vineyard interest in France's Rhone Valley, the Clines and a team of special agents led by the wily Agent Aristotle slowly pieced together the circumstances of an alarming grape shortage which traces its origins back to California varietal wine industry.
In a misguided effort to fill out production of their bargain-priced varietal brands, several important Californian producers have turned to the arid vineyards of Southern France. In response, many vineyard owners, from small, family-run operations to large, corporate vineyard management firms, have embarked upon a wild re-planting spree, focusing particularly intense development in the currently vogueish Californian varietals. While the rate of new plantings are soaring, hectare upon hectare of old vine vineyards planted to the region's traditional Mourvedre, Carignane, Syrah, et. al. are being uprooted at a dizzying pace. Southern French producers are faced with a grape deficit that threatens to crumble the foundations of the rich, traditional and delicious style of the Rhone, inundating it beneath a sea of vulgar, thin Cabernet destined for the tanks of unscrupulous Californian producers.
Californian producers found connected to the Southern French scandal declined to comment on the issue when contacted by Cline Times.
Cotes D' Oakley Now a Trio
Cline Cellars is proud to announce the release of its third and final member on the Cotes D' Oakley triumvirate. The 1996 Vin Gris, crisp and bold rose blended from select lots of dry-farmed Mourvedre and Carignane completes a trio of wines that, the Cline feel, offers a uniquely Californian answer to the current onslaught of budget-priced imports.Also, visit Cline Cellars Cotes D' Oakley-Vin Rouge and Cotes D' Oakley-Vin Blanc.
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